What Now…?

18 Feb

You hooked up and it was great. So you’re probably thinking, what do I do now? Should I call her? Does she want me to call her? Do I want to call her? At which point, depending on your personality, you’ll probably descend into an existential crisis about the true meaning of the word ‘call’, or else design a program to compute all the possible variables and decide that the best option statistically is to never, ever, leave the lab again. But fear not! Tell your mind to chill the fuck out and put away those safety goggles! It’s not really all that complicated, you just need to consider a few things…

  1. How well do you know her? If she’s been your friend since the first week of freshman year, never contacting her ever again is really not a good idea. Unless you want all the girls in her college to smile knowingly/openly point and laugh whenever they see you.
  2. How was it? If it could be mutually considered great, chances are you might want to do it again and in order to make that happen, you’re going to have to stay in touch. Unless it was the kind of great that should remain an isolated incident never spoken of again, even under torture and/or the influence of Dubra. In that case, you probably want to forget her name and, potentially, give yourself some recovery time.
  3. How was she? We don’t mean was she good. We mean, how did she seem to feel about the situation? If you are in any doubt, (i.e. if she did not spell out explicitly what she wants/expects) then you two should probably catch up at least once to clear that sort of thing up, or else, here comes the awkward train!! Jump on enthusiastically and then look forward to 3/2/1 more year(s) of that horrible instant when you recognize each other, remember why, and stare at each other with an expression appropriate to just having had a broom handle inserted into your rectum (which, for all we know, might be what you remember each other for.)
  4. How are you? Saving, as always, the most important for last, how do you feel about it? This is one of those times when listening to your gut is useful. Is it something you want to happen again? Was it just a physical thing or did you have an awesome conversation (possibly a fascinating debate about whether President Levin or Dean Gentry would be the better kisser)?

We know we seem to be bashing you over the head with it, but communication really is the most useful thing ever. That means, if she calls you, (and hey, it happens), don’t ignore her calls. At least find out what she thinks, it might help you figure out what you think (or let you know that you should take advantage of Yale’s free STI testing).

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