How to Fight Productively

8 Feb

No relationship is perfect. Realistically, you are going to have disagreements once in a while and that is perfectly normal. Couples who agree all the time about everything are just creepy in our opinion. That said, there are a few things you can do to air and discuss your grievances in a way that doesn’t end with the pair of you standing at opposite ends of the room, yelling and ducking to avoid flying shoes.

  1. Don’t fight at night. We know that disagreements are most likely to arise when one or both of you are tired, and that here at Yale, tired is most people’s default setting, but trying to have a serious conversation at 2am is never going to end well.
  2. Don’t fight drunk. Alcohol makes you honest, sometimes a little too honest, or at least a little to blunt. And Culpability of Intoxication only goes so far in convincing her that you don’t actually think she kisses like a seal trying to swallow a trout.
  3. Don’t fight on her period. As much as we might try to deny it, we women really are just an emotional battlefield that week, and you really don’t want to step on a landmine. So it’s probably best just to nod and agree as much as you can and return to the subject at a later, less explosive, date. Also, for the love of all that is holy, DO NOT under any circumstances tell her that she’s overreacting due to PMS, unless you want the relationship equivalent of the H-bomb to explode in your common room.
  4. Don’t be mean. In the heat of the moment, it’s easy to say something you’ll regret and she’ll take to heart. Tempting as it might be to ‘win’ by bringing up that thing you know she’s really sensitive about, don’t. She will remember and she will trust you less because of it.
  5. Don’t interrupt. Try to give each other a fair hearing. Going into a discussion already convinced that the other person has nothing useful to contribute and you already have everything exactly right is never a good idea, especially in relationships. You should both be able to give your view in full and then hopefully:
  6. Compromise! It really is the best thing ever.

2 Responses to “How to Fight Productively”

  1. Home Page June 10, 2013 at 1:40 AM #

    Isn’t going to cherish the actual Home Page game in any way. the results on the spin are fully random, so if your not having any lucky day then its probably best to walk away.


  1. The Hitching Post Blog » Blog Archiv » Love Is… - April 19, 2012

    […] the small stuff. 2.Learn how to fight productively. The key to fighting productively is to recognize when a disagreement is going in the wrong […]

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